The text: Psalm 38 – NRSV
We come at last to a psalm of confession. These psalms, sometimes called penitential psalms, are laments. But they are introspective. Here the primary enemies are no longer external forces or armies; rather, they are the psalmist herself! The pleas, the cries of pain are as poignant as those in Psalms 3 or 109, but the pain here is perhaps more intense because of the realization that it is within us, part of us, and caused by us. As you read, listen how the psalmist describes why she is suffering, and the things she has done to cause it. Hear the agony of her broken relationship with God, that incredibly close relationship described in Psalm 139 and lamented by Paul in Romans 7. It is because of the psalmist’s faith in God and in this relationship that the psalm does not end in despair, but clings to the hope of restoration.
How do we restore our relationship with God? Such a great Lenten question! Confession, as a Lenten discipline in its own right, is a necessary first step. It requires honest, clear-sighted self-assessment. As even Aristotle famously said, knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom. Be curious about why you behave as you do. Bring the results of that curiosity back to God in prayer. In the process, allow yourself to forgive yourself, as only then can you accept God’s forgiveness. Then read this Psalm again and let it speak for you. You may find that it hits hard, quite hard. But that can be a good thing. As Malachi says, he is like a refiner’s fire. Cleansing. Clarifying. When the fire is past, you may even find that you have repented just a bit, that you have changed your orientation just a bit in a Godward direction, and that you and a being that loves you more than you can imagine are almost seeing eye to eye. Now we’re talking.
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